For Lack of a Better Word

I wrote the following post back in August of last year, and except for the part about the Olympics, the post is still eh, somewhat relevant. I don't think I've ever posted any part of it but, hey if I did, then read it again dangit. And if I didn't, then in the spirit of protecting the earth's resources, you know being GREEN, reduce, reuse, recycle and all that jazz (What? Oh don't tell me it doesn't apply to blogging!) I thought I would go ahead and post it for you. I have several such as this one, started, not finished. Random ideas floating about and pinned to the cork-board of my blog's dashboard like a long forgotten post-it reminder. And those will follow...

In the mean time, I'm writing something that's been a recurring theme. It is a difficult quilt to pattern, so it is taking me quite some time to lay it out, piece it together and make it in to something you can use. Bear with me, k?

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I'm Not So Good At This...

...blogging more often thing.

Every time I write a new post I say to my blog "I will come back much sooner next time." To which she replies rather snottily "Whatever."

"What's that supposed to mean?"
"You know exactly what it means. I don't think I need to spell it out for you."
"Well fine then, don't."
"Fine."
"Fine."

I admit it, I have been pretty lame at the blogging games.

...watching every Olympic event thing.
Speaking of games, my daughter and I were watching the Olympics. Sad but we've not been able to watch everything as I am old and must be put to bed early right after I take my Geritol and The Golden Girls is over (RIP Bea Arthur). However we've not missed out on everything. We got to watch the oh-so-popular highly-anticipated and watched-more-than-any-other-sport THE men's water polo games.

It was USA vs. Croatia.

I was completely lost the entire time....I couldn't follow a thing I mean for one, half of the game is under water (duh) and with all the splashing about and going back and forth across the pool it was never very clear where the ball was nor who was on what team. But what was quite clear and truly amazing was that those teeny tiny itty bitty pieces of what I think were supposed to be bathing suits held on for their dear little lives during all that action. In fact I think they should award medals for that feat of athleticism alone.

This match in particular was, according to the announcers, unexpectedly exciting due to the fact that Croatia was favored to have a very easy win over the Americans but it seemed the Americans had other ideas (don't we always?) and kept the lead with a very close score. At one point the cameras panned to the Croatian team members on the side lines where they are jumping around, running up and down and cheering on their teammates while their patch of spandex, displaying stamina achieved only by those with the greatest skill, were holding their own. At this point the announcer says, I kid you not, "Boy, it just doesn't get any tighter than this."

Let's hope not Dave. Let's hope not. To the spandex goes the gold.

...patience thing.
I hate to shop. I really do. I know, it's not American. It's not female. And it's just not normal. Oh well.

This past weekend was the tax-free weekend and along with half the world and their momma we did our parental duty - school shopping.

To me that is like the worst form of shopping there is folks. I mean, let us just head right on over to the mall, join a mob of strangers and take our kids for several hours on end and spend gobs of money on stuff they will never use in the classroom however the school requires it EVERY year as well as clothes they won't be able to wear in 3 months time why don't we?

The thing is, and perhaps (just a slight perhaps mind you!) this applies to me just as much, people are just rude. Inconsiderate, selfish, blind, arrogant and rude - especially when it comes to being in a store.

Whether it's parking their cars/carts with no care what so ever as to where anyone else is, cutting you off with their car/cart, trying to run you over with their car/cart, leaving the cart in the aisles so that no one can pass and then glaring you down as if you are trying to kidnap their precious bundle of joy (that just so happens to be standing in the cart being ignored) when you move it, letting the aforementioned precious bundle of joy (that you hope no one does kidnap - uh maybe) run willy-nilly around the store screaming as if there were a bloody fire that they want this that or the other, generally walking about like mindless zombies as if no one else in the world exists except for them, or leaving unwanted items - be it their precious bundle of joy, their merchandise or their trash - strewn about as if this were a dump site. Or perhaps it is all of the above. Whatever the case, these are the very essence of why I hate to shop.


...parenting/it takes a whole tribe thing.
We are ever changing, (n)ever growing creatures are we not? Myself included in the growing and changing business...however I'm not so sure it would be considered growing UP or in the right direction. Lately I've found myself being less and less patient with and even less desiring to be around other people's children. HEAR/READ me carefully people please. I've had 4 children and know (boy, do I know) that they will be children...I am referring to the undisciplined, unmonitored, untrained little monsters that scream/whine/throw tantrums/cry on and on and on without reason, running a muck & destroying all that lay in their path and seemingly with no parental unit to take them by the scruff of their neck and teach them the error of their ways.

What...? Me, God? No way. So, um, You are telling me I scream/whine/throw tantrums/cry on and on (and on) without reason? Hey, I have my reasons. I mean, not that I whine. Okay, okay....I whine. But no one hears it Lord. Oh, You do? Right. I guess you got me there. You do take me by the scruff of my neck and teach me the error of my ways don't You Father? Sigh.

Dear Lord Baby Jesus how do you keep from killing us? They say that's the reason children are so cute when they are asleep. No wonder You watch over us as we sleep.